An obituary for the press in the post-Trump era.


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The New York Times in October published a collection of essays claiming the Trump presidency has “cost” the United States its “innocence,” its “generosity,” and its “apathy.”

However, what the collaboration does not mention are the things that the Biden administration will “cost” the country, including that it will bring an end to what Vanity Fair calls the “golden age for journalism.”

We say goodbye, then, to journalists elevating as worthy of public notice obvious liars and lunatics, including convicted felon Michael Avenatti, gossip columnist Michael Wolff, mental health quack Bandy Lee, and conspiracy theorist Louise Mensch — all because they oppose the administration.

Goodbye to weekly “bombshells” that land with a “splat!” instead of a “boom!”

Goodbye to near-daily input from presidential historians turned political assassins.

Goodbye to members of the press acting as if the cover artwork of the latest edition of a prestige news magazine is in some way provocativestunning, or even particularly interesting.

Goodbye to White House correspondents pretending as if they are reporting from an active war zone or claiming they feel safer covering authoritarian regimes.

Goodbye to the Holocaust being invoked against the administration on a near-daily basis.

Goodbye to members of the press cheering America's enemies who may have insulted or upstaged a White House official.

Goodbye to the steady flow of news stories covering how reporters feel about covering the presidency.

Goodbye to members of the press pretending as if failed GOP “strategists” have a genuine concern for the future of the country and not just the health of their bank accounts.

Goodbye to news cycles based entirely on unverified gossip from disgruntled former administration staffers.

Goodbye to the seemingly endless stream of palace intrigue stories featuring people no one knows doing things no one remembers.

Goodbye to White House correspondents being celebrated exclusively for their histrionics and activism and not because they serve the public interest. Goodbye also to the pure theatrics of White House press briefings.

Goodbye to all the “Gorpman and Bleemer” news cycles so indiscernible and far down the rabbit hole of legal minutiae that it requires at least an hour of back-reading just to understand what the hell is being reported.

Goodbye to journalists pretending as if their lives are in danger because someone in the administration criticized them. The Biden White House will treat the press just as harshly, albeit more professionally. But don’t expect to hear journalists complain about it in the same self-important tones that they have used for the past four years.

Goodbye to news cycles based entirely on the say-so of anonymous sources, especially those “familiar with the president’s thinking.”

Goodbye to industry-wide meltdowns over innocuous and harmless events, including the renovation of the White House Rose Garden.

Goodbye to wise-ass on-air news headlines, as they have given way already to saccharine and heroic descriptions of the president-elect:

Goodbye to true statements by White House officials being flunked as “false” or “mostly false” because of some tiny technicality cited by fact-checkers. We say goodbye also to fact-checkers being treated as celebrities and heroes.

Goodbye to stories about how the president is "raging,” “unraveling,” and “fuming." We say goodbye to reports about how the president is “isolated” and articles about how it is the “end” for the president.

Goodbye also to news cycles suggesting (or stating outright) that the president is mentally deranged.

Goodbye, all. It has been a crazy four years.

See you all back here the next time a Republican is president.